‘Pleasure Principles’ on Netflix – What You Should Know About Women, Sex, and Orgasm

“I can name 90 slang names for my genitals,” says a woman in the Netflix documentary Principles of Pleasure. But do you know exactly what her vulva is? She looks a little helpless. The other women who are incredibly open about their sexual experiences, lusts, and bodies in the three-part series have no idea either.

This is what the Pleasure Principles are all about: everything we don’t know about women’s sexuality. What not even the women themselves know about him. And what ultimately leads to the fact that there is another big gap in addition to just knowledge. They are orgasms. While straight and gay men only climax 85 percent of their sexual encounters, lesbian women climax only 75 percent of the time—and straight women only 63 percent (read the 2017 study here).

This “orgasm gap” is not new. The questions posed by the “Pleasure Principles” are long overdue: Why hardly anyone cares about this? Why are women often so willing to accept it that they don’t want to? And above all: what can you do about it?

I went in search of her lust

In three episodes of 50 minutes each, the documentary attempts to find answers. It allows only women to express their opinions, including sexologists, neuroscientists, and sex-game experts. In some places, you can clearly feel that all the heroes are from the USA. When it comes to sex education in schools one woman reports how her gym teacher dealt with it in ten minutes by having the class say “penis” several times in a row. On the other hand, sex education in Germany is an integral part of the school curriculum and usually part of biology lessons.

However, such US references should not be deterred, since most findings from “pleasure principles” are valid worldwide. Like the hymen, which is probably better known to most people as the hymen. The myth continues that the hymen is like a kind of “seal of freshness” for the female sex, which was destroyed the first time, sexologist and author Emily Nagoski once explained. But in fact, the hymen stretches upon penetration. If it breaks, it heals again afterwards.

Written by Sexologist Emily Nagosky, The Guide to Come As You

Written by Sexologist Emily Nagosky, The Guide to Come As You

Source: Netflix / Courtesy of Netflix

So the desire to read a woman’s virginity from the hymen is complete nonsense. As is the notion that direct sex that includes penetration is only the first time. But it is precisely such notions that still haunt many people’s minds and contribute to how we talk about a woman’s desire or sexuality — and how women experience it themselves or not.

Number one of the “pleasure principles” in particular is quite shocking in this context: Only 50 percent of women who think they’ve had an orgasm during sex have actually had one. The other 50 percent only think so because they’ve never had one in their lives and only think they know how to feel. Conveniently, the documentary also explains what the female orgasm is, that is, eight to 12 pelvic contractions, which initially occur at intervals of one second and then at increasingly shorter intervals.

Just a little pulp? Clit much more

Female Anatomy: The Almost Unknown Truth About the Clitoris

Where does ignorance come from? All experts on the show agree on this question: Female sexuality has been suppressed for too long and not sufficiently researched yet. For example, neuroscientist Nicole Prause, who deals with the potential positive effects of masturbation on health, reports that it is very difficult to get financial support for her studies. University decision-makers are often uncomfortable with the topic of sexuality – for this reason alone they often reject relevant research. This, in turn, prevents scientists from working in this field.

Prause has known for years that some people sleep better after they have an orgasm. But instead of figuring out why this is and using connectivity to control insomnia, people simply continue to prescribe sleeping pills.

concrete advice

But it’s not just these surprising aspects that make the Netflix documentary worth watching. But also very tangible advice that women can use to explore their lust. Among other things, Dirty Lola, creator of the sex podcast, offers sex toys and explains which ones are suitable for beginners or what to look for when buying a sex toy if you have small or large labia.

Sexologist Emily Nagosky also has a tip: She advises women who struggle with their bodies – probably the vast majority – to do a little exercise in order to make friends with the way they view themselves. To do this, you should stand in front of the mirror “as naked as you can bear” and write down what you find beautiful in yourself. “First of all, the head will be flooded with thoughts about what is wrong,” Nagosky explains. But the more you exercise, preferably every day, the clearer you will see the body.

It deals with the power of beauty ideals

Elisabeth Lechner explains white, thin, curvaceous and youthful beauty and its related problems

By the way, the vulva is what many people call the “vagina”: the entirety of the pubic mound, the labia majora and small, and the clitoris. Whoever saw “The Pleasure Principles” will definitely not be mistaken again.

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